Thursday, April 23, 2015

Being protected....being thankful!

I flew to Houston on Monday with no problems at all...flying out of St. Louis. Roselyn was there to pick me up swiftly and we had a wonderful evening with grilled rack of lamb, green beans-fresh, rice, and pickles.  Dessert was lumquats (a cousin to Kumquats) and they are a bit tart and a bit sweet. Only 4 grams of phosphorus in each one. They were yummy!! The next morning, my alarm failed to go off at 6 and I was woke up at 6:22 by Roselyn. I had 38 minutes to shower and get presentable for a very long day at MD Anderson. I had lots of children's books stashed in my purse along with my computer. I had my food book in case I saw Vicki Davis for her to keep it for a week and read over it....and my schedule and plane ticket.  It took us about 20 minutes to find the Mays building at MD Anderson as it all looks different when you are used to going to a parking garage and entering the Cancer Center from there. I get to the infusion area to receive fluids and I then realized I had left my purse in Roselyn's van. I had no phone, no money, no children's books to sell, and no number to call Roselyn when I was done with everything at MD Anderson so she could pick me up and take me to the airport. I was FRANTIC. I was scared....I had messed up in a very big way. As I sat in my room being pumped full of saline, the nurse came in and saw the big raindrop sized tears in my eyes. She asked me what was wrong and the lump in my throat kept me from answering.  After I got a little composure back, I told her my situation. I asked her to see if she could get me a phone book. I prayed..I said the Lord's Prayer, I prayed again. I told God I needed His help and NOW!  The nurse came back only to tell me they didn't have a phone book. She said they would google his name as they have a home phone. She comes back only to say there are lots of people with their I told her his occupation and BOOM....she had their home phone number. I called 25 times and it was busy every time. The nurse came back in and saw I was still upset and she left. She went to the front desk and called the number and Roselyn answered. The whole time, I am realizing that although I have my airline ticket, my drivers license is in my wallet in her van. I felt like a mouse in a round barn looking for the corner! I WAS FRANTIC! I WAS STUPID! HOW COULD I BE SO RECKLESS!!  The nurse reappears, smiles at me with the big raindrop tears in my eyes, and says "Honey, I have talked with Mrs. M and she will be right here and bring your purse to you.  I cry harder.....realizing God had just made me realize I had to trust with all my heart and all would be ok. And it was. God is with me EVERY MINUTE of EVERY DAY! I have never went to my appointments alone but it was just a day of bloodwork and see Dr. Javle. No big deal...right?  I made a bloody mess....and that nurse didn't have to do everything she did to help solve the problem. But she did!!  God plants people in your life...the family I stayed with, the nurse who helped locate the family to retrieve my purse with all my important stuff in was all ok.......
As I laid in bed finishing the infusion, I thanked God for everything that was resolved that day. I thanked Him for getting me through THAT bump in my day......It was just a lot of stress too early in the morning.
I got my bloodwork done, then on to wait to see Dr. Javle. Ron, Dr. Javle's nurse came and sat down by me in the waiting room and asked what was wrong. I said nothing but he could see I was not myself. I stated it had been a hard day but I would be ok.  I had lost 4 pounds in two weeks....I was truly keeping count of every phosphate I put into my mouth! I was pretty sure my numbers would be good as I had walked a straight line as far as the phosphate diet. WRONG!  My phosphate was 7.....that means they took me off the trial the last week of cycle two. Some of my other numbers were a bit high also. With BIG puddles of tears, my doctor enters the room about this time. I told him I just didn't get it. I had been SO good. The gentle giant (Dr. Javle) convincingly tried to tell me it wasn't me that was the problem and he was sure I had followed the diet to a T.  That's why it's a clinical trial, they are trying to figure out the right dosage at a safe level.  I will go back to MD Anderson on May 4-7 for a CT scan and bloodwork -which went way back down last cycle and all my bloodwork looked super. I will be bumped down to the 75 mg of the clinical trial pill and see if that's the right "fit" for me. As Dr. Javle says, I am not defeated, I am doing what's best for my body by lowering the dosage and doing less harm to my organs. When I do return, I look for my bloodwork to be much better and my mind and body are ready to keep fighting. To keep thanking God for giving me the strength to "Get back up" whenever I felt so defeated that day. That devil was not going to ruin my day!!  I was picked up by Roselyn and taken to the airport. I ate a late lunch and waited for my flight back to St. Louis. I was never so happy to see my Buick pull up at the airport. On the 2 1/2 hour ride back to Suntone Beach, I thanked God many times over for being with me that day. For the nurse who went an extra mile to get my phone, wallet, and I.D. back into my possession. For a doctor who calmed me down and took the extra time to make sure I was ok before leaving.
As I sat in the airport eating my late lunch, I saw so many people rushing about to catch a plane to wherever their life was taking them. Again, I thanked God for allowing me to be entering my 5th year with this cancer. To be fighting for my life but feeling pretty darned good. I am blessed in SO many ways.
The next week and a half are filled with lots of Relay For Life events. We have our great Italian Beef Fundraiser at the VFW this Friday night from 4-8 and we will also have desserts available for a small price. I will be signing/selling books until we run out BUT we have more coming on Monday or Tuesday (next week) so we will get you one and FAST since the Relay is May 2nd. It's time to sell books FAST and deliver them, mail them, whatever it takes to get the books sold!!
I am feeling well and look forward to seeing lots of people in the next couple of weeks at Relay events. Please support our fundraisers in Richland County. Please pray for added patience in my life, for peace, calmness, and gratitude for the wonderful life I live. I am blessed and I thank God every night as I lay my head on my pillow and every morning I wake up for the new day ahead of me.
Yes, I am blessed........thank you God!
Feeling thankful,

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